*Disclaimer: I seriously considered writing, “I threw up. The end.” for this month’s post and leaving it at that. If reading about things along those lines makes you feel ill, please just skip this post.
Nausea was my first clue this precious life was growing and by 6 weeks I was getting sick each morning and evening, sometimes (often?) multiple times. The homeschool calendar, my personal planner and journal all end the same day- October 7th. That’s when the morning sickness switch flipped. Everything resumed 11/2 as I began to feel the light and the end of the tunnel. I was still getting sick each day, but I could function in between again. Needless to say, I was *really* glad we’d started homeschooling in June!
At just 5 weeks, 6 days I was called into get an ultrasound because having endometriosis increases my risk of an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy. We’d brought Caleb with us, after much discussion and prayer, deciding that he deserved to be able to celebrate or grieve with us. Caleb has a fairly uncomplicated view of death and this played into our decision as well. In his mind it’s as simple as, “God created us to live forever, but since sin and death entered the world, we get sick, our bodies die, but our souls live forever.” While he misses the person who has died and has to process through that loss, he seems to innately understand the eternal nature of human souls.
Not only did we get to see our little bean was where she belonged, we got to see her itty bitty heart beating away. I cried. Caleb exclaimed, “Awwww, it’s soooo cute.” Which was hilarious because, it’s a speck, but a very very loved speck.
In the midst of all this, David had his work trip to Hawaii. The tickets had already been purchased and were non-refundable so, medicated with a B6/unisom cocktail and covered in much prayer, Caleb and I boarded the plane. By God’s grace, I managed to get through all the air time without incident, but I did get sick in every airport we stopped in, both ways.
I was also extremely sick the entire time we were there, so while I was still able to enjoy certain aspects of Hawaii, talking about it still makes me feel a bit queasy. If it hadn’t been for the wife of one of David’s coworkers who was willing to stick with me, despite my green color and slow pace, I probably wouldn’t have been brave enough to venture further than a block from my hotel room. I was so dehydrated that my heart felt like it was constantly pounding and I was dizzy often.
As it was though, with Teresa’s help, Caleb and I were able to go to an army museum, the aquarium, over to the air force base to visit with his cousins, and do a historic tour. I also took Caleb swimming every day, either in the pool or in the lagoon (he did not like the waves and adamantly refused to go in the ocean and in my condition, I wasn’t going to coax him to do otherwise).
As a family, we spent time exploring the island including turtle beach and a beautiful waterfall/gardens area, went to 2 luau’s (which unfortunately involved eating, but I did enjoy the shows!), drove to Diamond Head, watched fireworks and payed our respects at Pearl Harbor. Even as sick as I was, it was an unforgettable trip and I’m so glad I went.
Other than that, highlights from this month consisted of Caleb praying, almost nightly that God would, “heal Mommy’s strong smell.” (I’m pretty sure he meant the fact that everything smelled awful to me, but we can’t be sure ;) ) and asking me, often, if I was in the 2nd trimester yet so that, “you’ll feel better and can play with me again.”
It was a rough month, but worth every bit of it.